Thursday, February 2, 2012

Chapter 135 EPOV

Ms. EBT has been asking for an EPOV since she started pre-reading, and I wanted to thank her for being there for me, as well as give readers an insight into Edward's thoughts. I thought Chapter 135 would be a great place to do just that.

Unfortunately, almost every response to his POV has been the opposite of what I intended readers to come away with. So, I wanted to clear that up here.

Edward really does love Bella. I know his actions don't show that in regards to Angela, but he doesn't know how to deal with the fact that he loves Bella but likes Angela. He's a lost little boy who knows he's about to lose the love of his life, so he thinks he can cushion the fall out by having Angela there. He's not thinking clearly during his argument with Angela at prom, so his thoughts in his POV are jumbled.

Just like Angela, he's gone about things the wrong way, and I tried to portray that in this POV. Unfortunately, I didn't convey that message well enough, and I'm sorry for that. I know that the content of stories can be taken differently by the reader, but with the almost unanimous response being more of a "He really doesn't love or like either Bella or Angela" instead of "He scrambling to stay afloat and doesn't want to be alone," I felt that it was best to let you know what I intended with his POV.

I'm still growing, learning as a writer, so I'm taking this as a lesson learned.

Thank you for sticking it out.

Con Amor Siempre,


  1. I liked the EPOV. I took from it that boys can be emotionally clueless... and derp a lot. Thanks for writing!

  2. i have to keep reminding myself that they are so young.... it makes a little more sense to me that way....i still want to slap edward silly though ;)

    this story has infuriated me like no other .... and i know you have been getting some pretty passionate reviews and that's just because you are making people FEEL. i can't wait for more!

  3. After I read it, I felt that he was just confused and immature (as he should be as a high school boy). This is cheesy, but I'm a college student, and I just took this class where we talked about love. A huge thing we discussed is how many teenagers and young adults see love differently than adults (most adults anyway). Love isn't just a feeling. Love is a commitment. It's about your actions. So if Edward really loved Bella, in our eyes, he wouldn't cheat on her because cheating would hurt her (and his actions would be actions that don't show love). But Edward is young in this story. He's a real 17 year old. And many 17-year-olds (heck many people) think that it's fair to love someone (have this deep emotional tie to them), and still cheat on them because cheating is about physicality not emotion (or at least not the same level of emotion the cheater feels for the person they love). Anyway, my point got all convoluted, but I truly believe Edward loves Bella, in the way that an immature, confused young person can love. And I think he feels the cheating doesn't mean he doesn't love Bella because his deep feelings for her remain and whatever he feels for Angela pales in comparison.

  4. I took it as he's a 17 year-old boy, who doesn't understand what he's feeling for either girl, and/or how to process those feelings adequately. So the way he came across to me, was a typical teenage boy, just trying to protect himself and being arrogant about it by figuring he'll always have a backup in Angela, regardless of what he thinks he feels for her, because "she loves him". His thoughts are immature & cocky, but he is still just a young boy. (I still want to slap him though!)

  5. I have to keep reminding myself that they're young too, LOL! And as a shrink-in-training, it's even harder for me with this story, cause I just wanna dissect everyone's thoughts and motives, and at the end of the day, there really isn't anything to dissect cause it's a case of kids being kids. :)

    I loved the EPOV! I think it was a perfect demonstration of just how confused Edward is and how scared he is of the idea of being alone. His motives seem a wee bit selfish, but that's teenagers for ya! ;)

    This story is incredible -- your writing is incredible. If it wasn't, you wouldn't have a huge following of us screaming at our computers and rattling off emotion fueled reviews religiously every day. I'm so glad you created this and shared it with us! It's one of the best fics I've read in a long time!


  6. Ok, consider the cookie reinstated (it's @RDL85 btw). I get that Edward may be in over his head in this and it is scary for him. What I do not like is that in the end, he's settling for Angela when it won't work out with Bella. Angela loves (or loved him) and I just don't think Angela deserves that. Then again, she doesn't deserve to come of this unscathed either.

  7. Writing a story like this takes balls, and you've got them! You've done a good job of delving into human nature, and how conflicting and confusing emotions really are. I don't think you've done anything wrong, even in EPOV. Each of your characters are human and flawed, and you've portrayed that very well. Even if Edward does come off as selfish, I still can understand that he does love Bella, and is confused by his own behavior. But that's real life. Sometimes we act on things we don't understand. It's like addiction, doing something we know is wrong because we can't help ourselves.

    You've written this in a way that makes us feel. Good, bad or otherwise, it brings out strong emotion. And that's what good art is supposed to do : )

    Thanks for sharing.